SUBJECT: "JOSEPH"
FILE NO. TTL-0001 · EYES ONLY · CLEARANCE LEVEL: COOKIE
| CODENAME | THE INVENTOR |
| AGE | 8 (going on CEO) |
| HEIGHT | taller every week, impossible to track |
| BASE OF OPERATIONS | A garage lab somewhere in Leander, Texas |
| KNOWN VEHICLE | a very fast bicycle |
| WEAKNESS | chocolate chip cookies |
| STATUS | ALWAYS PRINTING |
redacted lines: hover (or tap) to view. you did not see this.
§1 · ORIGIN STORY
Subject has been tracked across three countries and shows no sign of slowing down:
§2 · KNOWN SKILLS & TRAINING
- Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. Subject can escape a hug he does not want. Approach with snacks.
- Skiing. Alpine-trained in Europe. Reports say he is faster than his dad and knows it.
- Ice hockey. Plays in Texas, which surveillance confirms is a real thing Texans do indoors.
- 3D printing & toy invention. Primary threat capability. See §4.
- Gacha machine operation. Handles the crank. Cannot be bribed with his own inventory.
§3 · EDUCATION
Subject attends Alpha School in Austin, the first AI-powered school, where academics take two hours a day and the rest is for building real things (see: this entire website). Subject is part of the gifted-and-talented program at GT School. Intelligence analysts note the school's model and the subject's toy empire appear to be directly connected.
§4 · THE OPERATION: TEXAS TOY LAB
Subject founded and runs Texas Toy Lab: designs toys, prints them on the family print farm, and sells them at Austin kids markets and online. Built a rack of four NVIDIA DGX Spark computers with his dad that powers the Imaginator, a machine that turns any kid's idea into a real toy. Parent-supervised; the subject's parents run the business side. Full technical debrief in the blueprint.
§5 · KNOWN ASSOCIATES
- "Dad" · quartermaster, rack co-builder, reads every order
- The Guard Guinea Pig · morale unit, load-bearing, incorruptible
- "Reachy" · Reachy Mini field agent; talks to visitors on the website and attends stalls in person
Recommendation: do NOT attempt to out-invent the subject. Buy a dragon instead.